• If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.
• Things which matter Most, Must never be at the murcy of things that matter least
• $$$ not found -- (A)bort (R)efinance (B)ankrupt
• "You cannot strengthen the weak by weakening the strong."
• Buy a Pentium i you can reboot faster.
• 2 + 2 = 5 for extremely large values of 2.

• Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.
• C:\> File not found. Should I fake it? (Y/N)
• Windows: Just another pain in the glass.
• Law of Probable Dispersal: Whatever it is that hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.
• Everything I did in my life that was worthwhile I caught hell for. - Earl Warren
• C:\DOS C:\DOS\RUN RUN\DOS\RUN
• Press any key... no, no, no, NOT THAT ONE!
• CONGRESS.SYS Corrupted: Re-boot Washington D.C (Y/N)?
• Computers are not intelligent; they only think they are.
• A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history--with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila. - Mitch Ratcliffe, _Technology Review_, April, 1992
• If you want truly to understand something, try to change it.
• Confidence is the feeling you have before you understand the situation.
• Diplomacy is the art of saying "Nice doggie" until you can find a rock.
• DON'T VOTE - It Encourages Them
• Lead me not into temptation. I can find it myself.
• What the mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve!
• BACKUPS? We don't need no stinkin' BACk*$x6
• A)bort, (R)etry, (G)et a beer?
• If debugging is the process of removing bugs, then programming must be the process of putting them in.
• Programmers don't die, they just GOSUB without RETURN.
• Programmer - A red-eyed, mumbling mammal capable of conversing with inanimate objects.
• Real programmers don't document. If it was hard to write, it should be hard to understand.
• Beware of programmers who carry screwdrivers.
• I idiot-proof my programs,but along comes a bigger idiot
• How fortunate for those in power, that people do not think.
• Who's General Failure & why's he reading my hard drive?
• "No users of microcomputers want multitasking, nor would they be able to use it. All they would ever do with it would be background printing, and you can do that under DOS." -- Bill Gates, 1987
• "Everything you need to know is on the Internet. You just can't find it." -Anonymous
• Computer programs do what you tell them to do, not what you want them to do! A computer without COBOL and Fortran is like a piece of chocolate cake without ketchup and mustard.
• Dreams are free, but you'll get soaked on the connect time.

Wars Fought - Revolutions Started - Assisinations Plotted
Governments Run - Uprisings Quelled - Virgins Converted
Tigers Tamed - Bars Emptied - Computeds Verified
Orgies Organized - Elections Fixed

ACHTUNG!!! Das machine is nicht fur gefingerpoken und mittengrabben. Ist easy schnappen der springenwerk, blowenfusen und corkenpoppen mit spitzensparken. Ist nicht fur gewerken by das dummkopfen. Das rubbernecken sightseeren keepen hands in das pockets. Relaxen und vatch das blinkenlights!!!